A girlfriend of mine sent me a box of cards with inspirational quotes as a surprise “I love you” gift. And if you haven’t guessed already by our TGIM series, we love inspirational quotes! This box sits on my desk and randomly I will select a new quote from the box when I need a little pick me up. For a few weeks I was stuck on this quote by Virginia Satir -“Ask for what you want, instead of always waiting for permission.” Generally speaking, I am always waiting for permission.
I am not sure if this is an older child trait, or a habit from my childhood, or just something about me, but I like to bounce ideas off of others or seek counsel before moving forward. I like to follow the rules. I hardly ever am a rebel without a cause. This thought to not want to stir things up crosses over into things that I actually want to have or want to do. Before I can even think about asking for it, I talk myself into why I don’t need it or why I don’t deserve it.
Anyone else with me on this? Don’t get me wrong – staying in the lines can be good, but not when it comes at the expense of your well being or your personal growth. At work, I struggle with things like asking to be part of meetings I am so curious about or about a promotion I feel I deserve. I instead talk myself out of it, saying I am too busy for that meeting and that I should be thankful for the job I have. And I am thankful! But does it hurt to throw my hat in the ring for additional opportunities? No. I am the only one hurt by not doing it. Recently, I set up and attended a meeting with a client I had been dying to meet, and it went so well. My boss was happy, I was happy, and the client was happy. A win-win! Why did it take me so long?! Who knows! But at least I have a positive experience to remind myself of next time I try to talk myself out of something I want.
Are you holding yourself back, waiting for someone to give you permission? Today, give yourself the permission to go after what you want!